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Getting Deep

Today was a good day. Nothing extra amazing.

Then i went to my old youtube playlists… Wow, the memories i have attached to songs. The feelings and emotions. The tears. And the memories. I feel caught in a storm of bewilderment and sensation, crashing on the footsteps of my mind.

I remember so much i had tried to put behind me. Old Boyfriends and the poetry of lust i would write to them. The feeling of aching from the inside out to be with them and how i adored them.

Remembering how passionate i was. Drug induced passion. Areality that was not real but i lived it anyway. I once told a boy he was my daydream, my fever.

I want to feel that immensely again. Minus the drugs. I want the passion, the poetry. the debauchery, the lust, the love. It was beautiful.

So thankyou youtube playlists for showing me a part of myself.

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